That evening you had decided to go for a walk. The talk between you and Uwe was still fresh in your memory. Even though Ludwig had assured you that Uwe would keep his mouth shut, it still didn’t sit well with you. What if he did talk? That would mean your plan would be ruined. You couldn’t let that happen. Not after all the trouble you had to go through to get this far.
You sat down on some crates and watched the sun sink behind some tents in the far distance; the sky was dyed in a dark red and orange colour. How fitting, you thought cynically, as your mind jumped to the upcoming battle. The fields of Langensalza would be died in a deep red colour, but there would be no beauty in it. There never was and never would be beauty in the horror that was called war. It only left death and destruction in its wake…a painting of horror, created by an age old desire within the hearts of mankind.
You felt sad all of a sudden and decided to resume your walk, in the hope to get rid of the sorrow that overwhelmed you. You knew perfectly well where it stemmed from…the sadness. This was, after all, your last day on this earth. A part of you didn’t fully want to realize it; tried to deny and suppress the thought. It was too painful to admit; it would only lead to an emotional breakdown, that pool of misery you constantly threatened to drown in. You had to be strong now…you had to remain sane if you wanted to succeed.
You had to die. There was no alternative ending to your story.
You were so lost in your thoughts that, when you were about to turn around a corner, you suddenly bumped into someone. The collision was quite the hard one; you stumbled backwards, tripping over your own feet, and toppled over, hitting your head against the hard ground. Your eye-sight went blurry; black spots danced before your eyes and you could feel a terrible headache come up. Your head pounded painfully, but your eyesight returned quickly enough. You looked up to see who you had bumped into and were met with two all too familiar red eyes.
Angry red eyes.
It was the look in his eyes that told you he knew. He knew about your true identity. There was no way you could deny it now.
“Well, this is quite a surprise,” he said; his voice full of barely controlled fury.
“Gilbert, I know this looks weird, but I can explain,” you said, as you put your hands up in defence. That was a lie of course. How were you ever going to explain your presence without betraying your real cause?
“Oh, believe me, I’m looking forward to it.”
You tried to look as innocent as possible, but when you caught sight of the blond man standing beyond Gilbert, your face immediately contorted into a large scowl. “You little snitch!” You shot up, faster than an arrow could be shot from a bow, and launched yourself at Uwe, but without much success. Gilbert caught you before you were able to do any damage. It was a vice-like grip; he was careful enough not to hurt you, but he was hell-bent on keeping you in place. “Let go of me so that I can scratch his eyes out,” you growled, struggling to get free.
“Scratch his eyes out? I should give the man a medal, really.”
“Don’t even think about that,” you said with a hiss in Uwe’s direction. He had betrayed your trust…he had went against your bidding, even though you had asked him – no begged him – not to tell on you. Gott, he had even gone against Ludwig and with that against authority! If there was anything he deserved, it was punishment for his betrayal.
“Gott, dammit, Uwe! We told you not to…and yet you go and tell on me? What kind of a friend are you?”
Uwe opened his mouth to say something, but Gilbert’s angry voice prevented him from doing so. “Now, isn’t that interesting? I suppose that with we, you mean you and my little brother?”
Oh, no, what did you do? He hadn’t known about Ludwig’s involvement!
“Uh, no. Just a slip of the tongue, really. That’s all,” you said, as you stopped your attempts to free yourself from his hold.
Uwe awkwardly watched the scene between you and Gilbert; he was standing in the background, almost invisible in the shadows of the night.
“You’re dismissed, soldier,” Gilbert said with a short glance in his direction. Uwe saluted, turned around and walked away, disappearing behind a row of tents soon afterwards. You felt more than just a little frustration when you watched him walk away…without any form of punishment enacted on him. He had betrayed you and yet he got away without undergoing anything of the sort.
“And you, you’re coming with me,” Gilbert said as he turned his flaming red eyes back to you. He let go off you, grabbed you by your lower arm and pulled you with him.
“Gil, hey, let go off me” you protested once more, but without much success. It felt like talking to a wall. When you had reached his tent, he sat you down in a chair and started to pace back and forth in front of you. Watching him made you kind of nervous and you were aching to break the deafening silence that hung between the two of you.
“You know…I’m getting the subtle feeling that you’re not really happy to see me,” you said as you slumped in the chair, trying to make yourself as little as possible.
Gilbert stopped pacing around, moved until he was standing right in front of you and sent you a silent look. The dark shine was still omnipresent in his eyes.
“What are you doing here,______________?” he asked, his voice low as he bent over, trapping you in the chair. You looked up at him.
“I just wanted to see you.” The lie sounded quite convincing…perhaps because – if you thought about it- it wasn’t a lie at all. You had been dying to see him. You had missed him so hard that it hurt you to see him this angry with you.
“As much as I’d like to believe that…you’re lying.”
You noticed that his grip on the armrests strengthened; the wood cracked alarmingly under his hold. Gott, he really was angry with you.
“Now, there has to be a reason for you to be here. I don’t know what that reason is, but my best guess is that you planned something…something stupid that will end up with you getting hurt. Why else would you go through the trouble of avoiding me and…dressing up like a man?” he said thoughtfully, as he reached out a hand to caress your head, moving his fingers through the short strands of hair you got left. You enjoyed the tender touch…forgot about the trouble you were in for a few seconds. What are you going to tell him,_________? The voice in the back of your mind whispered. A lie, perhaps?
“I was just dying to see you, okay. And I wanted to do something…help you in one way or the other. No ulterior moves…just that.”
Gilbert shot you a glare which meant as much as “I don’t believe a word of what you say.”
“Gil, please, don’t be angry with me. I can’t stand the thought of that,” you pleaded softly as you looked down, fumbling with the hem of your shirt.
“Do you get why I’m angry,_____________?” he asked, his voice still on the low side.
“Because I shouldn’t be here?” you tried.
He shook his head.
“No, because I’m worried about you.”
You looked up at him, a little surprised at that. “But I…”
“You seem to have lost all sense of self-preservation. Try to see this from my point of view. I’m sitting in my office and one of the soldiers suddenly appears, tells me there is a girl among the men, dressed like a soldier. You know that little nagging feeling when you don’t want something to be true but it turns out to be exactly like that? Well, here it is.”
“I’ll be quite honest with you, Liebling. As much as I love you, I don’t want you to be here. I don’t want to have to worry every second of the day whether you’re okay or not. I can’t.”
That was kind of sweet, right? Or was it just you not understanding what he was saying?
“I just want you to be save,_____________. This is no place for you. People die here.”
It is exactly my place, you thought gloomy. If only I could tell you. If only you would understand why I have to do this.
“Really, what are you doing here? If Ludwig has anything to do with this…”
“Ludwig didn’t do anything,” you were quick to defend the young boy. “I asked him to smuggle me in here. He just helped a friend…like the kind-hearted person he is.”
“You know that doesn’t change anything about this whole situation, right?” he said with a sigh.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because obviously, you would have never allowed me to come here.”
“And with good reason,” he said, his voice hoarse now. “Someone has to think about your well-being…because to me, it looks as if you’re trying to get yourself killed.”
You had to try your best not to say anything to that. You bit your tongue hard and looked him in the eye. “Gil, I just wanted to come with you. I knew you would never allow it and thus I decided to ask Ludwig. He said it would be better for me to dress up like a man so that I wouldn’t be recognized as a girl by the rest of the soldiers. Said it would stir up a commotion.”
Nothing of what you said was true; the words- these lies- tasted like poison as they rolled of your tongue…poisoned with a true-sounding lie.
Just how much more of this were you to take?
Gilbert looked at you; a hint of doubt in those red orbs.
He sighed and then said: “Fine, I believe you. But I still don’t like you being here. Tomorrow, I’m sending you back to Berlin.”
“Please, don’t. I can’t be on my own in Berlin. I’ll die of anxiety…of having to worry about you.”
“I told you that there’s nothing to…”
“Don’t give me that,” you said, tears stinging behind your eyes. “You know damn well that I’ll worry any way. Knowing that doesn’t change anything about how I feel!” Perhaps you were being a little melodramatic now, but although most of your words were lies, the feelings that lay underneath them were not. They engulfed you and pulled you down. “I don’t want to go back.”
You were crying now. You were crying like a hurt little child. Tears were flowing down your cheeks.
Gilbert’s eyes softened a bit when he saw you like that.
“Come here,” he said softly. He grabbed your arms and hauled you up, trapping you in a hug. You rested your head on his shoulder and waited for the tears to stop flowing.
“How about a compromise?” you sniffed. “I’ll go to one of the neighbouring villages…and I’ll stay there till the battle is over…” That was another lie of course, but you had to get him of your back. If he was going to track your every step, you would never be able to get even near the battlefields. Gilbert remained silent for a few seconds…he seemed to consider the idea, which was a good sign. “Fine with me.”
“Great! That way I can come and see you after the battle. Feeling a little better already.” You did, but for different reasons. The idea that there would be no such thing as an after-battle reunion tore your heart to shreds.
Your grip on his shirt tightened involuntarily at the thought.
“You should get some sleep, Liebling,” he said as he let go off you. “I bet you got some long days behind you.”
“Actually, I don’t feel all that tired,” you said, feeling rather bold.
~ (warning: lemon ahead) ~
You grabbed his shirt and pulled him close to you. Tomorrow you would be dead. That little fact had become a certainty in your life…an unsurmountable thing that came closer and closer with every breath you took. But then again…since you were hundred percent sure you were going to die…didn’t that mean you had to enjoy your last day on earth to the fullest? What better way to enjoy it than by enjoying it with the one you loved so dearly? You remembered the passionate moments the two of you had shared in the past…you ached to be with Gilbert…your heart throbbed with painful desire for him.
A stream of naughty images filled your head and you immediately felt your cheeks flush a bright red.
“My, my, you’re as red as a tomato, Liebling. I wonder what it is you’ve been thinking of,” Gilbert said with a grin. “Do tell me.”
He pressed his lips to you cheek, causing your skin to burn with a feverish heat.
You swallowed, unsure of how to proceed. “Gil…I…really missed you. Not being with you…it…”
“Hurt?” he said, as he moved to look you in the eye. “Yes, I know. I felt the same about you.”
Your heart skipped a beat at those words. You smiled at him, a fragile smile full of love.
“I…ah…this is really awkward…I don’t know…,” your cheeks burned with unspoken thoughts.
“Let me help you with that, Liebling,” Gilbert said, after which he bent down to kiss you. It was a soft tender kiss, like the two of you had shared multiple times before, but it soon became passionate…needy…turning into a dance of fierce love. You fisted his shirt, holding on for dear life and let him dominate the kiss. You became lightheaded, felt your blood run hot under your skin, pulsing with an age old desire. You broke the kiss to catch a breath, your chest heaving from the intensity. You moved to stand on your tiptoes, softly pressed your lips to his and whispered: “Prussia, I want you.”
“Hmm, I love it when you say my name,” he said, his voice thick with lust. A hot passionate shine had taken over the red of his eyes.
“I know that,” you said, intertwining your hands with his, dragging him with you towards the bed that stood in the far corner of the tent. You pushed him down and straddled him, trying to keep the blush of your face when you did so.
It kind of surprised you Gilbert had allowed you to pin him down since he usually was the dominant one in whatever intimate action the two of you had had. You liked the idea of being in charge, but with it being your first time, you were a little too shy to actually do it that way. And besides…you had no idea how to go on. Gilbert looked at you…a hint of amusement in his red eyes.
“I bet you find this hilarious,” you said with a somewhat sour look in his direction.
“Ah, I do. It’s adorable. I admire your boldness though,” he added with a smirk. He sat up, which caused you to slide into his lap. He placed a line of kisses on your cheek, moving down towards the tender skin of your neck. He sucked at a little sensitive spot right above your collarbone, which was enough to drive you out of your mind.
You wrapped your arms around his neck and ran your fingers through his soft hair; lightly tugging at some of the strands. You could feel Gilbert’s grip tighten on you when you did so. He made a sound that looked a lot like purring; a deep rumbling sound that vibrated through his chest. You chuckled a bit and then moved your hands under his shirt, tracing the line of his spine up to his neck and shoulders, feeling his muscles tense under your touch. You retreated your hands and started to unbutton his shirt, revealing the marble skin of his chest, marred with the faint lines of scars.
“Where did you get this one?” you asked while tracing one of the scars on his left side.
“First Coalition War…got stabbed by France. Got him back for it in the end.”
“That was…the Seventh Coalition War, right? Waterloo?”
“Hmm, you know your history well.
“Because it’s your history…I might have been reading your diaries while you were gone.”
“Why, that doesn’t surprise me at all.”
“Dear diary, today I finally got back at France,” you quoted with a smirk, slowly kissing your way from his neck to his collarbone. “The bastard totally deserved it.”
He laughed at your little recitation. You could feel it rumble in his chest, in perfect harmony with the strong heartbeat right underneath his skin. “All those centuries of life…all those people and nations…and yet you fall in love with an ordinary human girl. I still don’t get it.”
“Means you’re one hell of a girl, Liebling,” he said softly.
“I’d start to believe so,” you said with a smile.
Gilbert returned your smile with a gentle one of his own. You loved it when he smiled like that…you liked every single one of his smiles…even the sly ones.
“Now, since you got to undress me, it’s only fair I get to do the same with you.” He whispered against your ear. You were going to say something to that, some kind of come back, but you just couldn’t come up with anything befitting the situation. The shyness had returned and had made your voice go silent.
Gilbert gently pulled your shirt over your head and removed the bandages you had used to cover up your breasts. You felt horrified sitting there…partly naked. Gilbert must have noticed your discomfort for he kissed you, taking away all of your fear in a mere second.
“You’re beautiful, dear. But I guess you already knew that.”
“I know because you keep telling me that.”
He moved his head back to the sensitive spot in your neck, sucking a bit before biting down. It wasn’t hard enough to actually hurt you, but it did send shivers down your spine. Gilbert must have felt it too, for you could feel his self-satisfied smirk against your hot skin.
“Take off your pants,” he ordered.
You silently obliged and then went back to straddling him.
“I really like your legs…pity there’s no such thing as short dresses. Would have been magnificent on you,” he murmured while stroking your thigh, drawing little circles. You could only think of how good it felt, how you never wanted the feeling to stop. The whole of your body was hyperaware of his touch.
You felt bold and started planting little kisses from his neck to his collarbone, biting down right above the latter. Gilberts hands travelled down your sides and up to your rear, giving it a slight pinch. The sudden action surprised you and caused you to bite down harder than you had intended. You were shocked when the taste of blood filled your mouth.
“Gott, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to!”
“Relax, Schatz,” Gilbert said, stroking your head to calm you down. “I’m not made out of porcelain. And besides, I love rough play. You can bite me all you want.” He kissed you, dominating and full of passion.
You decided to make another bold move and grinded your hips, moving back and forth in rhythmic moves. You could feel him harden under your movements, which only urged you to become even more bold. You went on for a bit more, successfully driving Gilbert out of his mind.
You freed his erection and went on with your moves, feeling the pressure through the tin fabric of your underpants. You were becoming really wet now; your heartbeat so fast it almost bounced out of your chest. Sick with lust you were…and there was only one way to cure you of it.
“Prussia, take me,” you whispered into his ear.
“With pleasure, Schatz.”
He flipped you over, stripped you of your underpants and positioned himself in between your opened legs.
“This might hurt a bit,” he said next to your ear. With one thrust he entered you, breaking your wall and causing a wave of pain to flood over your body. You gasped and grabbed hold of him, digging your nails in the skin of his back, drawing blood. For a second, you felt a little numb down there, but it was soon replaced with a new kind of sensation.
“The worst is over, Liebling.”
You nodded. “Go on.” Your voice was hoarse.
Gilbert started to move rhythmically, pounding into you. With every of his thrusts, you felt the pleasure rise in your body. You arched your back, grinding your hips against his, trying to take in even more of him. You let out a moan as he filled the whole of you, making you feel as if you were in heaven.
“Ah, I love the noises you make,” he breathed against the skin of your neck. “Mind to give me more of those?” With those words, he sped up his movements, hitting deeper and deeper inside of you.
“Argh, Gil. I…I…this feels so good,” you moaned seductively. “More. Give me more.” The tension rose in your body, making you twist in pleasure. Your skin was burning feverishly.
To your surprise (and dismay), however, Gilbert suddenly slipped out of you.
“Don’t stop now,” you said, almost pleadingly, aching with desire.
“Who said I was going to stop?” he replied, his breath tickling your ear. “I just want to ensure that you get the maximum out of this. And besides, there’s no fun in it being over so fast. Now, how about you take charge?”
“Me?” You blushed a bit but did as he said. You positioned yourself on top of him, taking in his thick length once more, gasping a bit as you did. Gilbert’s hands moved to your hips and grasped hold of them firmly. You rested on your knees, which allowed you to take full control of the act. You moved up and down his cock, bouncing lightly as you did. You felt the need built up with every bounce you made, urging you to go faster. Your breasts moved in rhythm with your movements; little beads of sweat appeared on your body. Almost instinctively, you reached out a hand to your clit, rubbing it gently. As you did, a new sensation ran through you. Your body started to tremble uncontrollably; your tight wet pussy clenched around his cock, pulsing hard.
This was something entirely new but you knew you were only a step away from your climax. And from the way Gilbert held onto your hips, you could tell he was not far off his climax either.
“Aargh, I…I…can’t…” The shocks of pleasure that ran through you almost made it impossible for you to continue the bouncing. Gilbert sent you an amused grin as he saw you struggle. He put his strong arms around your trembling form and took over from you, delivering the final thrusts to push the two of you over the edge. You felt how he came and then came yourself. An intoxicating feeling took over your body and made your mind go hazy. You strengthened your grip on Gilbert, nestling your head in the crook of his neck as you tried to even out your breathing; the orgasm still pulsing throughout your body at full force. “That…was…amazing, Gil,” you panted. “I love you.” He chuckled lightly and affectionately caressed your head. “I love you too,________________.”
A few minutes later, you found yourself trapped inside Gilbert’s arms; your head safely tucked under his chin. You knew you would have to bid him farewell soon, but for now, you enjoyed the warmth and the love he radiated. It engulfed you, pulling you into a deep and peaceful sleep…